I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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