btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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