physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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