we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
