Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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