he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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