Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
