"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
You need Xanax blowdarts
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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