HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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