I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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