I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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