YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
