Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
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