let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
