guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
