Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
