yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
