Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
