Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Randomize
