Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
