Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
