so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
wow bdsm is so cute
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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