ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You are the jesus of drinking
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize