True but thats because hes a fetus.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
