butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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