i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
