Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
