I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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