You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
