i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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