just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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