about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
