went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize