He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
