let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize