And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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