In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
