Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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