i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
