I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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