Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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