I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
last night I used snow as a chaser
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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