i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
