I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
