you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize