just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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