Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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