i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
