physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Watching her eat just hurts me
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
