Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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